Well that's just great....

"itschrome" (itschrome)
02/12/2015 at 17:24 • Filed to: None

Just got off the phone with the girlfriend. Moments prior her best friend calls me to inform me that her other friend who happens to work at an apartment complex where her grandfather lives had just found him dead. She didn't want to be the one to notify the family so I just got to call my girlfriend to inform her that her grandfather had passed away. Luckily she is at her sisters house currently and she wants me to stay at work till I need to leave. But wow, never had to make such an adult phone call in my life. I feel awful, he was a good man. An old school pimp really. He was in his late 80's and gave no fucks, he'd leave the house in sweat pants, sweat shirt and a old school real mink jacket. I'm happy to say I got to meet him and even more so that he had given me his blessings in dating his grand daughter. Fuck that was a shitty call to make though...

DISCUSSION (8)

$kaycog > itschrome
02/12/2015 at 17:31

My condolences.

davedave1111 > itschrome
02/12/2015 at 17:35

That can't have been an easy call to make. Well done. And my sympathies to you and the family.

"she wants me to stay at work till I need to leave"

Don't do that. If your boss won't understand, it's lucky you found out he's a cunt now instead of some time later. You should be there for her, and you're not going to be any use for the rest of the day anyway. (Well, as long as you're not an ER doctor with no cover, or something. But if it's just normal office work or whatever, then the priorities are clear.)

itschrome > davedave1111
02/12/2015 at 17:39

no, it's best I stay here for now. she is at her sisters and they are going to go to her parents, whom had just gotten the call when i did. the rest of her family doesn't know yet. I am very much part of her family but she wanted it to be just her and her siblings when the rest of them find out. I can understand that, they are a large very close family. I was half out the door when I called her. and yeah that was not an easy call at all.

davedave1111 > itschrome
02/12/2015 at 17:53

OK, I'm sure you know your circumstances best. If they're still doing that, I can understand why you'd give them a bit of time. How long's left in your day, anyway? If you've only just started in the morning, I'd at least leave a bit early, but if it's already mid-afternoon where you are, it's a bit different.

But don't put work ahead of being with her, if there's any hint of that. You can always find another job, but you can't go back in time and offer comfort when it was needed. My grandmother passed away last year, and while my partner's been part of the family long enough that she almost felt like she lost her own grandparent, I can't tell you how much of a comfort it was that she was there.

itschrome > davedave1111
02/12/2015 at 17:55

I'm strictly on OT for now. they are heading over to the parents now. I'll leave here at 7 it's 5:54 now.

it's just crazy that I knew before any of her family. it's gonna be a rough long weekend.....

Carl (@stuffcarlsays) > itschrome
02/12/2015 at 18:03

It's never easy to make that call. Condolences to you, your girlfriend and her family.

itschrome > Carl (@stuffcarlsays)
02/12/2015 at 18:06

thanks man. I really wasn't easy.

davedave1111 > itschrome
02/12/2015 at 18:35

There's rough and there's rough. Sounds like he was the kind of guy everyone will miss, but who had a great life and lived to a good age. There ought to be plenty of good stories and laughter to go with the sadness.

If there's one thing I've learnt from my family in this, then it's that this is a time for those who've lost someone to do what's right for them, and not worry about appearances, or what the rest of the world thinks. What's right for us has always been more laughter than tears, more happy memories than grieving, more present than past. I find that works for us, whatever other people might think - and believe me, laughing at a funeral gets you some odd looks.